Life by Connection

Parenting by Connection should probably be called Life by Connection. It's an approach that has profoundly impacted my relationships across all spheres of life. So what is it all about?

Parenting is hard work. You deserve support as you do this vital work. In our society, parenting is seen as something of a hobby. But parenting involves deeply emotional work that can very challenging. The Parenting by Connection approach involves supporting parents so they can in turn support and lead their families well.

Parenting by Connection is an approach that values your wellbeing at least as much as your child's. This approach asserts that, like the life mask on an aeroplane, you need to care for yourself before you can provide the deep connection your child thrives on. The Starter Class which runs for six weeks gives you some vital refresher time. You can be with other parents and learn from their stories too. Parenting can be isolating; getting together and sharing a laugh or even a cry can be so helpful to busy mums and dads, nannas, foster carers and others who are responsible for the day to day care of kids. 

This approach is aligned with attachment research and neuroscience. It works on the assumption that you are a good parent, who wants the very best for your children. It also starts with the view that your children are good; they want to connect with you and others around them to play well, laugh hard and learn with real passion. Neuroscience and attachment research have shown clearly that children are born to connect with us and that their brain development relies on warm, responsive, loving care. 

This approach is a very practical one. What set this approach apart for me was both its alignment with research and its very practical and useful strategies. Tools like Special Time, which involves setting aside a short period of time aside regularly to spend one on one with your child, allowing her to name this time and be in charge during it, and then playing with abandon, really help to strengthen your relationship and to turn challenging behaviours around. But this is not a permissive approach. Parenting by Connection is an authoritative parenting approach. We rely on limits set early and often to help our kids work through the difficult feelings driving off track behaviour.

Emotional intelligence is something employers increasingly look for, and certainly something valued in the playground and in society generally. Parenting by Connection helps both parents and children increase their emotional intelligence. This approach gives you resources, tools and mentoring to help your kids become more resilient, and to help you find ways to lead your family in ways that make you feel great. These skills can help you in every relationship - it really should be called Life by Connection!

For more information about the Starter Class, or for more details generally, contact Belynda on pbcwithbelynda@gmail.com